SOUTHEND-ON-SEA | ROCHFORD | CASTLE POINT
email: firstname.lastname@example.org | call: 01702 667590
UNDER 11’s SERVICE
WHAT IS CONSENT?
Consent is when someone agrees, gives permission, or says “yes” to sexual activity with other persons. Consent is always freely given and all people in a sexual situation must feel that they are able to say “yes” or “no” or stop the sexual activity at any point.
Consent is never assumed
When consent can be given:
- If you are free to make a choice if there isn’t anything bad that would happen to you if you said no – for example if they were being threatened with violence ( by for example a friend or boyfriend).
- Freedom is also affected if there is a power imbalance between two people, because of age, status or some kind of dependency (i.e. drug use, financial control).
- Having the freedom to consent means doing something because you WANT to, not because something or someone is pressuring you one way or the other.
- Capacity is about whether you are physically and/or mentally able to make a choice and to understand the consequences of that choice.
- It’s the same as the law that says you may be physically able to drive a car when you are drunk but you are not mentally able, if you are drunk or high, you don’t have true capacity to agree to sex.
- Capacity is also affected if you have some kinds of learning difficulties or by age… basically, anything that means you aren’t fully aware of what saying yes or no means.
- Consent is not ongoing and needs to be negotiated not only every time you have sex (regardless of with same person or different) but even during sex as you start to do different things.
- Consent is contextual which means that if you agree to sex with particular stipulations (i.e. a condom), your consent is tied to this.
- If someone has sex with you outside of the particular context you specified, then this is not consensual.
Watch this video to find out more about consent:
Watch this video about The PANTS Rule & help spread the word:
CHILDRENS & YOUNG PERSONS ADVOCACY
At SOS Rape we have Children’s Independent Sexual Violence Advocates, you may hear people refer to these workers as CHISVA’s which is the short version for their proper name.
A CHISVA’s role is:
- To deliver advocacy and support service to you if you are aged 17 years and under.
- To help you access appropriate therapeutic interventions and to develop your own support network through internal or external referral processes.
- To provide emotional and practical support through the criminal justice system and beyond as necessary.
- To empower you to be able to share their thoughts and feelings with your carers and professionals working with them.
- To risk assess and help you keep safe, including preparing personal safety plans in conjunction with professionals working you.
- To consider and respond to safeguarding issues raised about you or someone you might know and support you with liaising with other agencies accordingly.
- To support you to access your rights.
- To support you to access health services.
- To attend relevant multi-agency meetings/panels where appropriate to support meeting your needs and ensuring YOUR voice is heard.
- To provide information about the impact of sexual violence to you, your carers and other agencies to enable you to understand and better respond to trauma behaviours.
UNDER 11’s PLAY THERAPY
SOS Rape Crisis provides play therapy for children under the age of 11 who have experienced sexual abuse. The child does not need to have disclosed to the authorities in order to access services.
Play therapy recognises that children will not usually communicate their thoughts and feelings verbally in the way adults do. Instead, they use the mediums of play and creative arts to communicate and process their difficulties. Play therapy gives them a safe and confidential space to help them understand their emotional, physical and behavioural responses to the abuse. Children are never forced to talk about things that make them worried or confused.
Sessions last 45 – 50 minutes and are usually the same day and time each week. SOS Rape Crisis usually offers up to 20 sessions, but the play therapist will discuss progress and plan an ending in partnership with the child and parent during regular reviews.
Parents will be required to remain on site and wait in the waiting area for the duration of their child’s session. Watch this video to find out more about consent:
SUPPORT FOR RELATIVES & CARERS
SOS Rape Crisis recognises that it can be extremely distressing for parents to know that their child has experienced sexual abuse. Parents / Carers can access up to 6 counselling sessions to help them process their own feelings about what has happened. Monthly Parent Support Groups are also available. If you would like further information please ring our office or make an online referral and a Rape Crisis Worker will be in contact with you.